"I mean, I don't blame you! I couldn't do it either, but there's nothing you can do about it, Ariel!" Adriana, the eldest of the sisters, replied.
"That's the thing, Adriana. I CAN! Two words for you: Sea. Witch."
"Oh my, you KNOW Dad will never let you set foot near her. Don't even think about it. She will probably give you what you want, but it will come with the greatest of price. She doesn't do things for free, you know?" Adriana tried to rationalize with her younger, naive sister.
"I don't care what I have to do. If I get to live and marry the prince, then I will do whatever it takes to get there! Make me a promise, just don't tell Dad, okay?" And with that, Ariel swam off into the deep, dark depths of the ocean to find the only person that could help in these desperate times.
The ocean became darker and denser as Ariel swam closer to the witch's home. She could feel the water becoming colder and icier the further into the depths of the ocean she went. Finally, after what had seemed like hours, she arrived at the forefront of the Sea Witch's lair. Mounds of seaweed covered the front door; obviously the witch didn't care too much about any visitors to keep up with the grooming. As Ariel approached the front door, a group of electric eels swarmed around her.
"Exxxxxcuse me, ma'am. Who are you? Why have you crossed into the depths of my master's lair?" the oldest of the eels demanded.
"I'm here to see the Sea Witch. I, I, I....I know she can help. I need to become a human. Please, let me in. She's my only hope," Ariel stammered.
 |
| (Sea Witch by Nadezhda Illarion) |
"HAHAHA. A human? You silly fool. I'll gladly let you in, but you have no idea what you're getting yourself into," another of the eels said. And with that, the doors to the lair slowly creaked open.
Ariel hesitantly stepped inside and wandered around until suddenly a voice from seemingly nowhere cackled, "I know exactly why you're here. You foolish little girl! You think that prince could ever fall in love with you?"
"Of course I do! It'll be love at first sight. And not to mention he loved my voice when I sang to him as I rescued him. Even though he does think it's that temple girl. But I can show him it's me! It's me he's actually in love with! But I can only do with your help. So, please Sea Witch, I'm begging you. Can you help me?"
"Like I said before. You're a foolish girl! I would be glad to help you, but like everyone has told you before...it's going to come at a price. I will make you a human, but you must understand some rules, and remember to choose wisely. Once I make you a human, you will never be allowed to return to the sea as a mermaid or have any communication with your sisters or father. Secondly, if are unable to make the prince fall in love with you, and thus he marries another woman, the morning after their marriage, you will become but a speck of foam in the sea," the Sea Witch explained.
"I don't care what I have to do. I've already made my decision! Do it now!" Ariel said, nearly interrupting.
"Now, now...I'm not finished. You will also experience excruciating pain with every step that you take. That's the price you must pay in order to gain feet. And last, but certainly not least, that voice of yours? Yeah, it's gotta go. So, good luck making the prince fall in love with you. HAHAHA" the Sea Witch cackled.
"Like I said before. I've already made my decision. Take my voice, just make me a human so I can be with my prince!" Ariel began to cry.
"Your wish is my command"
And with that, the eels began to swim around Ariel, creating a whirlpool. Light and magic flashed all around and her voice began to escape her body. Painted pink toes now appeared where her green tail once was. Ariel's entire body quivered, and then suddenly the water grew still. Ariel slowly began to gasp for air, as her gils no longer belonged on her body. Quickly and swiftly Ariel began to swim to the surface of the ocean, quietly leaving her old life behind, ready to begin the search for her prince.
Author's Note: For my story this week, I decided to pick part 4 of Andersen's The Little Mermaid. All parts of the story were good, so it made it a tad bit difficult to choose which one I wanted to rewrite. Many are familiar with the Disney version of the story, and while some of the parts of the story are similar, there many parts that are much more gruesome. I combined elements of the Disney story (like the name Ariel and the eels guarding the lair); however, many of the other details came from the Andersen version. I hope you enjoyed reading it!
Bibliography: Fairy Tales and Stories by Hans Christian Andersen, translated by H. P. Paull (1872).
Hi MaKenzi,
ReplyDeleteGosh, what a dramatic story! As Ariel went to the witch's lair, I felt as though I, too, was swimming in icy waters. Your description of the physical environment is quite nice with regard to the lair and the eerie sense of fear that the eels create.
I also liked that the dialogue was prevalent in this story. However, the description of the characters - appearances, facial expressions, and other unique features - could have been more extensive. I felt that I didn't really have a mental "image" of what was going on because these details were largely absent.
However, I think that with the incorporation of these details into your story, this would be no problem at all.
Nice job with the story, MaKenzi! I liked how much detail you put into your version of the story! The way you described the various settings was a great way for me to feel like I was actually there, watching everything unfold. Your use of dialogue was also great! It definitely helped me relate to the characters. I hope to read more of your material soon!
ReplyDeleteMaKenzi,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your modern spin on the story of The Little Mermaid. I loved the amount of detail that you put into your story. It made me feel like I was right there beside Ariel during her adventures as she went to the sea witch’s cage. I liked how you described Ariel’s transformation from mermaid to human. The part about Ariel’s tail turning into “painted pink toes” was a cute touch. I also really liked the picture you used. Great job.
I also read this unit and I loved your version of part 4. I like how you based it mostly off of the Anderson version but also added a little touch of Disney. You did a really good job on the dialogue and your story flowed really well. Overall, I really enjoyed your version and I think the picture works well with it..
ReplyDeleteWow MaKenzi! I love this version of the story. The Little Mermaid is one of my very favorite stories... Funny story, I was actually named after the little mermaid... my middle name is Erielle. (like Ariel, but my sisters and I all have E middle names). I loved your version of the story! I thought you added great detail, and I loved the scary bits about the sea witch. Your story was so fun to read! Great job!
ReplyDelete